Hail to the Chief

Disclaimer: This political satire uses Xena, Gabrielle, and related hangers-on without permission from Universal/USA Studios.

Reality Note: This story is a satire of the decisions that lead to war, and is not intended to make light of the suffering of the refugees of Kosovo, or of the Serbs being bombed by NATO allied forces.

Uber Note: Uber fiction is a genre wherein the characters of Xena:Warrior Princess are placed in a different era, yet still recognizable as themselves. Theoretically. The problem is, it's often hard to tell who is who, based on the writer's ability. (Rueful grin here.) So to make things easier for the reader, here's who everyone is:

Cast of Characters

Madeline Albright, U.S. Secretary of State
Original Identity: Xena, Warrior Princess

Janet Reno, U.S. Attorney General
Original Identity: Gabrielle, Bard of Poteidaia

Hillary Clinton, First Lady
Original Identity: Callisto, Warlord of Cirra

President William Jefferson Clinton
Original Identity: (Insert your favorite choice here)

"Madeline Albright. She's a tough chick, cruising around the world as a force for good, presumably. She's a no-holds-barred kind of woman. I'd hate to meet her in a dark alley."
-Lucy Lawless, on what real person is most like Xena. (USA Weekend, courtesy MaryD's)

"Package's arrived for you, Ms. Albright." her intern announced, bracing the door open with her hip. "It's awful heavy."

"Set it over there, Madge." the Secretary of State waved, not looking up from her paperwork. "I'll get to it later."

"Yes, Ma'am." the intern said, gratefully setting the package down. She stood up and looked back at her boss.

Madeline continued working on her papers, until she noticed someone fidgeting in front of her. She looked up. "Yes?"

"I uh..." the intern paused, wearing an awkward smile. "I was kinda wanting to see you open it."

"You do?" the Secretary of State raised her eyebrows above her reading glasses.

Undaunted, the intern continued. "I saw them inspect it."

Madeline pushed her chair back and stood up, straightening her prim outfit. "Yes, the Secret Service are rather thorough with any deliveries to the White House. Alright, let's see it."

The intern snipped through the INSPECTED tape on the box, and opened the flaps for her boss. The Secretary of State reached into the box and withdrew a card. She opened it to read it.

'I won this at a charity benefit, and I thought it might benefit you.' she read from the card, flipping it over. '-Anonymous.'

Curious in spite of herself, she reached into the box again and withdrew a heavy object wrapped in cloth. She unfurled the fabric, revealing an ornate sword.

"Wow..." the intern observed.

"Indeed." Madeline nodded, looking it over. "This is going to have to go back, though. It's certainly over the gratuity limit."

The intern hid her disappointment, but her boss was a stickler for procedure. It would have looked nice mounted behind the desk, though.

The Secretary of State reached to touch the blade, intending to run her fingers along its length, but she never got the chance. As soon as her skin made contact with the metal, she jolted in place as the memories of a lifetime swarmed into her. Memories of another place, another era, another life. Her life.

"Ma'am?" the intern asked, worried at the expression on her face. "Are you okay?"

Xena put her hand to her head. "I... remember."

"Senator, don't worry." the Commander-in-Chief said to his caller, leaning back in his presidential chair. "Our mission objectives are being met."

He paused to listen to the voice at the other end, and then shook his head.

"Then he'll just have to listen." the President emphasized. "Slobodan is going to have to learn that violence is wrong, and the bombings will continue until he realizes that. Yes... Yes, no, thank you, senator. Uh huh, goodbye."

He hung up the receiver. "Blowhard." the President said under his breath.

The intern lifted her face up from his lap. "You mean me, sir?"

"Not you, the senator." the President chided. "You're doin' just fine on your own, lil' darlin."

The intern lowered her head again.

The President scratched his chin. He could feel his five o'clock shadow creeping across again, he would have to have that taken care of before his joint press conference with the Premier of China. He always had trouble remembering his name. At the moment, however, he was having trouble remembering his own name.

"Ahhhh, that's nice." the President relaxed under her ministrations, wiping his face. "There's nothing more stressful than affairs of state. But you're taking care of that just fine. There's only one thing that could ruin my day..."

Suddenly there was a furious pounding at the door, causing the intern to lift her head up from her assigned task.


"Oh hell, it's the Dragon Lady, uh First Lady!" the President corrected. "Quick! Get under the desk, while I act presidential."

The knocking continued. "Bill, I know you're in there!" the First Lady called. "Open up."

Standing up, the President zippered himself, careful not to repeat that incident from last May, and walked over to the door.

Preparing himself, he swung the door open. "Now look, Hon, I was in important consultations here on the phone just now."

"Uh huh, save it." the powerful blonde said dismissively, brushing him aside. "There's been rumors that you've had another intern in here."

"Rumors? What rumors?" the President asked jovially, closing the door behind her. "You know you're the apple of my eye."

"Spare me." the First Lady retorted, circling the room. She finally turned to face him, her hands on her hips. "Her name is Arlene, isn't it?"


"Is it or isn't it?" she exclaimed.

"That depends on what your definition of is is." he said with a straight face.

The First Lady's jaw hung open. Then she recovered her composure. "Don't try that lawyeristic crap with me! I'm the one who got a higher score on her LSAT, remember?"

"As if you'd let me forget it." the President said under his breath.

"Well?" the blonde prompted, staring daggers into him. "Is it true?"

"What can I say." the President shrugged with a grin. "I'm just offerin' the young people a taste of politics."

"I'll bet you are." she caustically remarked. Stepping close to his desk, she carefully placed her heel and brought it down on a protruding hand.

She smiled as she heard a muffled gasp from beneath the desk.

The President wiped his forehead with his hankie. "You need me for something?"

"Only for business." the First Lady coldly replied, raising an eyebrow. "The Premier of the P.R.C. is going to be here in several hours."

"I know." he responded. "Don't worry about that, he's knows I'm a friend of China."

"Not China, People's Republic of China!" the First Lady corrected, comfortably shifting her weight back and forth.

"Oh yeah right, forgot about Taiwan." the President nodded.

"We don't want to have an international incident." she continued. "God, you look a disaster."

"My prostate's been actin' up."

"Is that all?" Hillary remarked suggestively, digging her heel down harder. A faint cry elicited from the desk.

"Uh, is there anything else?" the nervous President asked.

"Yes. The Joint Chiefs of Staff want you to authorize a shipment of artillery to South Korea."

"I'll get right on it." the President nodded, opening the door again for the First Lady. He motioned for her to go through, a disingenuous smile on his face.

She ground her heel down one last time, and walked towards the door. But the President reached out and stopped her.

"What is it?" the blonde asked, with more than a hint of disdain.

He winked and leaned over to whisper to her. "I uh, I don't want to ask the generals this but uh, what's artillery?"

Hillary rolled her eyes, and left the office.

The President watched her go, catching the view as she stormed off. "Man, she sure does fill out a business skirt."

A groan from his office caused him to turn around with a grin. He quickly closed the door.

"Uh say there, Arlene?" he called out, walking over to his desk. "Is that other hand still working?"

"Should I call the doctor?" Madge asked her boss, who was now wielding the sword.

"No, I'm fine." Xena replied, weighing the heft of her blade. "Leave me."

"Yes, Ma'am."

"And tell my secretary to clear all my appointments." Xena said, walking back to her desk. "Something's just come up."

The door closed behind the intern, and Xena opened her right desk drawer and rustled through it until she found a gun holster left by a Secret Service agent.

"Perfect." she said under her breath, popping the clasps. Wrestling the holster straps on, she then slid it around her. Flipping her sword up in one motion, she sheathed it into the makeshift scabbard on her back.

"Now to find Gabrielle." she said deliberately.

"No, I am not to be available for any interviews!" The Attorney General nearly shouted into the phone. "Goodbye!"

Her stenographer looked up at her.

"Okay, resume dictation." the Attorney General waved at her, struggling to compose herself. "To summarize, the recruitment of more law enforcement officers can be achieved only if-"

Someone knocked at the door.

"If pigs fly out of my butt!!" she exclaimed, snapping a pencil in her hand.

The stenographer's eyes widened.

"Not that last part, of course." she said tiredly. The knocking continued. "Alright, take a break, we'll finish up later."

Her assistant retired to her side-office, and the Attorney General got up to receive her insistent visitor. "This better be good."

She opened the door to see the Secretary of State, who seemed to have a handle strapped to her back. "Hi, Maddy."

"We need to talk, Jan." Xena said, stepping into her office.

Janet's eyes widened as she went past, as the Secretary of State was wearing a broadsword strapped across her back.

The Attorney General closed the door behind her. "New look for you?"

Xena drew her sword in a fluid motion, and flipped the handle up. "It's beautiful, isn't it? Touch the hilt."

Hesitating for a moment at her friend's weird behavior, the Attorney General nonetheless reached forward to touch the metal. And then, in a flash, she remembered who she was.

"Xena!" she gushed with a smile, as the warrior lowered the sword.

"Gabrielle." the Secretary of State responded, allowing herself a rare smile. "It's good to- umph!"

Xena did not have a chance to finish her sentence, as her companion swept her into a hug.

"Ah, easy." the Secretary of State urged, as Gabrielle's grip lessened. "I'm not as young as I used to be, you know."

"I know!" the equally elderly woman responded. "But I couldn't help it. You've shrunk, Xena."

"You're just taller." Xena lied, knowing how short she was. "It's better, trust me."

"Now I know what it's like to look down in your eyes." Gabrielle noted. "But I am glad to see you."

"Likewise." Xena purred, leaning forward to kiss her.

Gabrielle reared back.


"It's just that, goodness." the redhead responded. "I'm so old, Xena. How can you look at me?"

"When I see you," Xena continued, taking her hand, "I see you with my heart, not with my eyes."

"Now who's the bard?" Gabrielle said, smiling at her. "You are the keeper of my heart."

"And you are the chief prosecutor of the United States." Xena complimented. "And before that, the top one in Miami."


"What is it with you and Miami, anyway?" Xena asked.

"I don't know what you're talking about." Gabrielle replied suggestively. "But you've done nicely for yourself, I see. You were once the Ambassador to the United Nations, working for peace. How appropriate."

"Yeah, until I got stuck in this job." the Secretary of State ruefully commented, sheathing her sword.

"I guess so." Gabrielle nodded. "Enforcing trade sanctions and threatening dictators, I guess that's not your cup of tea. I mean the trade sanction part."

"Well someone had to take the job." Xena explained. "You know how many SecState's this guy's had since he took office? No one wants this job."

"I could say the same about mine, come to think of it."

"Well, we've got a job, now." Xena said.

"Okay, what have we been brought back for?" Gabrielle asked. "I have enough hassles in my life without remembering than I'm an immortal bard."

"Likewise." Xena agreed. "It's no big thing. Just another warlord we have to take care of."

"You must mean the crisis in Kosovo." Gabrielle said, nodding. "Just another warlord. Well, we've taken care of a lot of them in our time. What do we need to do?"

"I'm not sure, but anything is better than what we're doing now." Xena observed. "But in order to fix this, I think we're going to need the help of one other."


"You're not going to believe me."

"Ha!" Gabrielle laughed. "As if I'm supposed to believe all of this?"

"That's the Gabrielle I know." Xena chuckled as the phone rang. "Hold on."

Xena walked around the desk as the phone continued ringing. She drew her sword.

"Xena, you're not going to-" Gabrielle exclaimed, but too late.

Shouting her war cry, Xena drove the sword down through the multiplexer phone, destroying it. The ringing stopped.

"I've always wanted to do that." Xena said in triumph, withdrawing the blade.

"Yeah, but it was my phone." Gabrielle said, indignant.

Xena looked at the phone, and then back at her. "Oh. Sorry."

"Come on, let's go find this other person of yours." Gabrielle smiled.

"We're going to the top." Xena said, sheathing her sword.

"The President?" Gabrielle asked, opening the door.

"Higher." Xena replied.

Hillary Clinton's press secretary looked up. "Yes?"

"We need to see the First Lady." Xena said commandingly. "Now."

"I'll check the appointment calendar." the man said.

Xena's hand reached for her swordhilt.

"Don't!" Gabrielle urged, stopping her. "Let me handle this."

"-Ahem-" Gabrielle cleared her throat, stepping towards the reception desk.

The secretary looked up as the Attorney General sat down on the edge of his desk, crossing her legs in what seemed to be a seductive manner.

"If you were to clear her schedule for an hour." Janet Reno cooed. "I'd make it more than worth your while."

The press secretary looked her over from head to toe, and started turning green. He also began shuddering.

"You're not a strawberry-blonde anymore, Gabrielle." Xena observed, ignoring her modern name. "I've always been in favor of the direct approach."

And with that, the Warrior Princess strode past the desk and turned the latch on the First Lady's door.

"Hey, you can't!" the secretary protested.

"She can." Gabrielle said ruefully, standing up.

"Me? Be a senator for the state of New York?" the First Lady said on her phone. "That seems like a step down, if you don't mind me saying so. What incentives could you offer?"

She listened to the caller at the other end. "Uh huh. Ooo, nice. I'll have to think about it. Okay, have your people call my people. Ciao."

The First Lady hung up her phone, only to see her office door open. Her Secret Service agent's head snapped around as the Secretary of State strode in unannounced.

The agent had been standing at sharp attention when the woman entered the office. His surprise was muted by the shock of the object strapped to her back, a sword of all things. He immediately moved into action. That was a mistake.

Xena expertly caught his wrist, and considered what to do with him. In a fraction of a second, she ruled out a half dozen counters to his attack which her aged body could not handle, and decided to use his strength against him. Going with his momentum, she painfully turned his palm towards his chest, and flipped him over on his back.

Gabrielle entered the office, and saw Xena stepping back as the agent quickly recovered and got to his feet.

"Bob, it's alright!" the First Lady exclaimed, waving at him. "I can handle this. Please uh, wait outside, okay?"

Blushing furiously, the Secret Service agent brushed himself off and left the office, nearly running into Gabrielle in the process.

Gabrielle closed the door behind her, wondering how they were going to explain themselves to the Dragon Lady.

"Well, you're certainly getting pushier with age, Madeline." Hillary observed, stepping forward. "And what's with the sword? Are you planning to knight me?"

"Something like that." Xena smiled, before drawing the blade and raising it before the First Lady.

Suddenly, Hillary regretted telling the agent to leave, but had no time to dwell on it, as the Secretary of State brought the flat of the blade down on her.


"Ow!" Hillary exclaimed as she reached up to her forehead where she had been bopped. But that was the least of her concerns, as her mind was inundated with images from times past, and the person she was. A slow smile spread across her lips.

"Xeeena..." the blonde smiled. "How I've missed you."

"Likewise." Xena grimaced. "You're looking good, Callisto."

"I try to keep up."

"Callisto?!" Gabrielle exclaimed. "She's the one we need?"

The former goddess chuckled. "Need for what, dears?"

"There's a small-minded warlord ransacking a territory." Xena explained. "With you and myself being former warlords, I think we can solve the problem."

"Who said anything about former?" Callisto sneered. "Look at me, I'm the most powerful woman in the world."

Xena opened her mouth for a retort, but thought better of it.

"She's got a point." Gabrielle observed.

"Ah, your little sidekick." the blonde mused. "Since you're not a warlord, I can only think of one reason why Xena would include you in on this."

"Ha ha." Xena said solemnly. "That joke was old three thousand years ago."

"How time flies." Callisto noted. "Okay, I take it you are talking about that little war in Yugoslavia?"

"That's the one." Xena said. "And your husband is failing miserably in winning it."

"Huh, I would think you would be more to blame for that." the blonde nastily observed. "Aren't they calling this Maddy Albright's War?"

"Why you..." Xena stepped forward, glowering. Gabrielle held her hand out.

"She's the First Lady, remember." Gabrielle warned.

"That's right!" Callisto agreed, a delighted expression crossing her face. "You work for me now, Secretary."

"Please, spare me the theatrics, Callisto." the Secretary of State warned. "People are losing their homes, and dying. You have more experience with that than either of us, right?"

Now it was Callisto's turn to glower. "Have a care, Xena. Time doesn't heal all wounds."

"Then help me heal this one. We are at the helm of the most powerful nation on Earth. Let's do something!"

Callisto thought for a moment. "Alright. But we'll need my husband for this, as if he were good for anything else."

Callisto had gone off to find the President, leaving Gabrielle and Xena alone in her office.

"Can we trust her?" Gabrielle asked.

"I think so." Xena nodded. "She's not just Callisto, she's everything she is now as Hillary Clinton."

Gabrielle raised an eyebrow.

"I know, I know." Xena frowned. "Putting the two of them together may not have been my brightest idea, but I could use her expertise."

"Okay." her companion said, noticing her expression. "Hey."

"What?" Xena asked.

"Keep your chin up." Gabrielle said. "You don't believe that stuff she said about you. This isn't your fault."

"Isn't it?" Xena replied. "We went into this war to help people out. A noble goal, to be sure, but we've only increased the suffering."

"You meant well."

"Good intentions don't win wars." Xena said. "You can't fight a limited war with air strikes only. You either wage total war, with troops and ships and everything you can muster, or you go home."

Xena paced around the office.

"The lesson of Vietnam was that you must fight a war to win, or you don't fight at all. This war is being fought so that NATO's leaders won't lose face, and the result is a half million refugees, and who knows how many dead."

"I remember our similar conversations when we were fighting the Pomira, the Horde." Gabrielle said wistfully. "But that was a long time ago."

"A very long time ago." Xena said, facing her. "But some things don't change."

"Like what?"

Xena reached out and traced her cheek, a cheek lined with age. "Like you don't know how much I love... you."

Gabrielle reacted to the touch, and nudged her face against it. "Close your eyes."

"Why?" Xena asked.

"Because I want you to see me as I was when I kiss you." she breathed.

Xena closed her eyes, and their lips met. She remembered the life they shared together, and the times they had. The bad times, they were less than a memory. But the richness of their life together flared into bright existence, as if it were yesterday. All with a kiss.

The door opened.

"Hoo boy, I'd like to get me some of that action!" the President observed, beaming.

Gabrielle quickly disengaged from the Secretary of State, and faced the Boss. She had to remember that she still had a modern life, and she would be in deep trouble if she reverted to "Xena's Sapphic sidekick" anytime soon.

"Bill, get in!" Callisto urged, poking him in the side. They entered and closed the door.

The President looked back and forth between his two cabinet members, who were both wearing innocent expressions. "Hillary didn't tell me you two were thespians."

"That's lesbians," Xena corrected, "and it's a private matter, sir."

Bill looked over at his wife. "It looked pretty public to me."

"Yeah well, they always carry on like that." Callisto explained. "It's nauseating."

"Don't you kiss your spouse, Hillary?" Gabrielle pointedly asked, enjoying her new double identity.

"Love is a trick that nature plays in order to get us to reproduce." Callisto sneered. "You'd think I would have learned that lesson by now."

"I'd hate to break up this women's issues discussion," the President warned, "but I'd like to take a little nap right now."

"We need to go to the situation room." Xena said, putting her hands on her hips.

"What for?"

"To end this ridiculous non-war you've got going." Callisto responded.

"Hey now, we've got to give this policy time." the President backpedaled. "Those people over there just got to learn to get along, and they aren't doin' it."

"Well how convenient." Xena commented.

"I feel their pain." the President protested.

"Sound bites like that won't help the refugees." Gabrielle added.

"But it's not my fault." the President held out his hands.

"Not your fault?" Xena asked. "Whatever happened to The Buck Stops Here?"

"The buck never got here." he said smoothly.

All three women rolled their eyes.

"All right, all right." the President acquiesced. "No need to p-whip the C-in-C here. Let's go. Lord knows, you certainly couldn't do any worse than my advisers have."

The President led the women through the various wings of the White House until they reached the special elevator of the situation room. Located deep below the White House basement, the situation room was where military strategies were carried out in time of war. Or in the case of recent years, "humanitarian interventions".

"Here we are!" Clinton proclaimed as the doors shot open. "This baby moves faster than those ones on Star Trek."

The President smartly saluted the officer on-duty, and they entered the Map Room. Every wall was covered with maps spanning the entire globe, and the group walked over to one large map in particular. The President squinted closely at the map of Eastern Europe, and frowned.

"I had a pin up here to show where Kosovo is." the President said, puzzled. "Al Gore must have pulled it out."

"There goes the war." Gabrielle observed.

"It's here." Callisto exclaimed, pointing to it. "Bill, go take your nap."

"Yes, dear."

Xena watched as the leader of the free world slumped off to find a cozy chair. "Why did you marry him, anyway?"

"He was an idealist, at one time." Callisto sighed. "And he was a big fan of the woman's movement."

"Yeah, especially when he's walking behind it." the Secretary of State observed.

Gabrielle chuckled.

"She couldn't have been this clever originally, could she?" Callisto pointed at Xena.

"She's very witty," Gabrielle said, "once you get to know her."

"Won't that be a joy." Callisto said dejectedly.

"Get used to it." Xena said. "Alright, I need options. Current situation?"

"The plan is to use surgical airstrikes on key Serbian targets."

"Mission objective?" Xena asked.

"To bomb them back to the negotiating table." Callisto observed, looking the targets over.

"That's no plan." Xena said. "It's never worked in any war before."

"Well actually, it did." Gabrielle observed. "Once."

Xena thought a moment. "The atomic bomb."

"How delightful, Xena!" Callisto said joyously. "You can double your number of kills from your previous life. Hades would be so proud."

"No." Xena simply replied. "Nuking the Serbs is out of the question."

"Exactly." Gabrielle piped in.

"How is nuking them any worse than other means?" Callisto asked. "More people died in the firebombings of Dresden and Tokyo than from atomic weapons. And after all, burning people out of their homes is your specialty, Xena."

"I haven't forgotten, Callisto." Xena replied. "I don't think a dozen lifetimes will make up for the things I've done."

"Uh, let's keep on topic, people!" Gabrielle suggested. Both women turned to look at her.

"Nuking them could be a start." Callisto said.

"No!" Xena said. "We are not at war with the Serbs. Firebombing them is not an option, either. And to be blunt-" Xena paused.

"What?" Gabrielle asked.

"Kosovo is part of Serbia." Xena observed. "It is not a sovereign nation. By all legal rights, Serbia can do whatever they want with one of their own provinces."


"Yes, it's wrong, it's immoral, it's crude." Xena said. "Use any adjective you want. But it's their land. If they want to chase these Albanians out of their home for the last three hundred years, there's no legal international authority to stop them."

"Then what do we do, then?" Callisto asked. "Send in ground troops?"

"Again, no." Xena replied. "Every administration official from top to bottom has stated in interviews that there will be no ground troops. By publicly telling our enemies what our next moves will be, we've cut off our own options. Milosevic will simply hold tight until the bombings run out, and then he will have won."

"Once he has control over the land, the war will be over." Callisto observed.

"But what about the killings, the atrocities?" Gabrielle asked. "We must put a stop to that."

"Really?" Callisto asked. "Why not do the same in Rwanda? In Sudan? In Tibet? This is a civil war, Gabrielle. A blood feud that is centuries old. It's none of our business."

The room was silent for several moments, save for the whirring of the computers. Then Gabrielle spoke.

"We should make them pay." she said quietly.

Callisto dropped her jaw. Xena stared at her.

"What?" Xena asked.

Gabrielle turned to look at her. "I said we should make them pay."

"Well well," Callisto chuckled, "the little pacifist wants to fight."

"Not that." Gabrielle corrected, gesturing at the map. "Look:"

Gabrielle pointed to the countries surrounding Serbia. "Each of these countries has had to take in massive amounts of refugees from Kosovo. The reason is that the Serbians kicked them out of their country."

"Not following you, Gabs." Callisto said.

"So? Look at Serbia. She has to do trade with these other countries, doesn't she?" Gabrielle continued. "Why should they have to resettle these people for free?"

"Go on." Xena prompted.

"Rather than bomb them, we should make the Serbs pay a resettlement fee for all of the Albanians forced from their homes, say $10,000 U.S. per person."

"Why would they go along with that?" the blonde asked.

"A total trade embargo by all of these surrounding countries would devastate Serbia." Gabrielle explained. "And these are the countries that are being forced to take these refugees."

"It makes sense." Xena said.

"But what about the refugees?" Callisto asked. "Surely they won't be satisfied with this. They'll want to go home."

"Of course." Xena said. "But not a single NATO nation is willing to send ground troops in to liberate their homeland, are they?"

Callisto was silent as she mulled it over.

"Good work, Gabrielle." Xena opined.

"I try." Gabrielle beamed.

"Alright." Callisto nodded. "The Albanians won't like it, but it's better than what they're getting now."

"That being nothing." Xena said.

Suddenly loud snoring interrupted their thoughts, and all three women turned to look at the sleeping President.

"You wanta wake him?" Gabrielle asked.

"Nope." the First Lady replied simply. "He's going to need that rest before he meets the Premier of China."

"Important meeting?" Xena asked.

"No." Callisto shook her head, smiling. "Campaign contributor."

Both Xena and Gabrielle did a silent 'Oh', and turned to look at each other.

"Well, this is going to be a more interesting workplace than before." Gabrielle opined.

"Yes." Xena agreed. "The three of us, working together."

"I think you misunderstand your place in the scheme of things, Xena." Callisto chided. "You both work for me now, how sweet. And I am the most powerful woman in the world. What do you say to that?"

Xena looked at Gabrielle, whose eyes twinkled at her. She turned back to the First Lady, and inclined her head slightly.

"Hail to the Chief." Xena said with a smile.

The End......?

"It is good that war is so horrible. If not, men would like it too much."
-General Lee, American Civil War

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